Best City in Baseball

Its been over a week since the Chicago Cubs clinched the National League Central and ending up with the best record in the National League overall this season. Tonight the Chicago White Sox clinched the American League Central in a tiebreaker game.
Chicago is lucky as it is one of the few cities that have two teams to choose from, northside and southside, and you must make a choice!
I think that since both of the teams have made the post season for the first time in 102 years that this makes Chicago the best city in baseball. Although I am a die-hard Chicago Cubs fan, I do find it exciting that I can make that statement. A Crosstown World Series would be absolutely amazing, admit it no matter what side you are on. The Crosstown Classic that happens over the summer is always an event in and of itself but a World Series?!
I also think its the right city for it to happen to. Chicago respects the game, respects the players and when it really comes down to it we respect each other. Sure Cubs fans have been hearing about 2005 for the past few years and Sox fans like to remind us that it has been 100 years, but at the same time that is what makes this city exciting.
Sox fans and Cubs fans get married and I think its becuase that way they can fight about something that ends up being good plain fun. I have lots of Sox fan friends, we like to call and say my teams better than your team, but it has never ruined or monopolized our friendship. Chicago fans of either side expect it and truely end up having fun with it.
I don't expect riots and stupidity because we respect the game too much, we want to remember the post season right up to the World Series as the major event that it is and respect it for what it is.
Chicago is the Best City in Baseball and I can't wait to see what happens next!

I Loathe Liars

I really don't understand why people choose to lie, I am willing to bet that 4 out of 5 times you are going to get caught! I guess everyone is just hoping to be that fifth time.
People don't like that I tell it like it is. I can be cruel with my honesty, but wouldn't you rather me be honest than lie to you and you find out the truth later?
If you annoy me, I'll tell you. If your new haircut looks ridiculous, I'll tell you. If I don't want to do something with you, I won't make something up and end up doing that something anyways without you.
Why is it so hard for me to trust someone? Because being lied to, mistreated and misled is more common than being told the truth and having follow through. Neither of my exes had any follow through, lots of promises but no action. My friends have always been the same way as well. Is it me?
Is OK to always push someone to the side, maybe knowing that they will come back for more?
I am there for everyone, at anytime, I wish I could say the same about the people I am there for.

Birthdays: forgotten or completely blown off.
Break-Ups: She'll get over it.
Plans: Hey we can cancel on Nicole its ok she wont notice.
Invites: Tell her you have something better to do, how will she find out?

Thanks to crazy websites like Facebook and MySpace and the joy of AIM and Yahoo Messenger, people know more about each other in an instant than they did from the rumors in high school.
I'm just not happy and I don't like constantly being pushed to the side when all I ever try to do is make everyone else happy. Because of the lies I am cutting people out left and right becuase forgive and forget gets harder each time. Although I am getting rid of the people that hurt me, it also hurts to discover that you are all alone.

Plenty of Fish... Guppies Maybe!

Have you ever used a singles website?
I've been on them in the past, more as an ego boost then to actually find love.
I have never paid to be on the sites though, I think that is just ridiculous, but I let the people email me and then I would delete it since you can not email them back without being a paid member.
Recently I found one that is free, its called PlentyofFish.Com, cute right? Apparently the people you find on a free singles website are choosing to be on the free website because the majority of them do not have jobs!

My main thing now while looking for a new man are the following:
I do not want him to live at home with his mom.
I want him to have a job and ambition to move up within his job.
I want him to have a car, it doesn't have to be the best but my name is not Jeeves the Chauffeur.
I want him to be tall, good-looking and not at all hairy.
I don't want him to be married, divorced or have kids.

I do not think that these are at all odd requests but the only guys that email me are living at home in their parents basement, they have no jobs, they have no car, they have 3 kids with different people and they have a full beard. Hmmm... I also think they are incapable of reading because HELLO you are not what I want! Needless to say I have not gone on a date with any of the guys from The Fish, nor will I in the near future. I don't think online dating is for me since there needs to be a sense of trust to meet a perfect stranger that may or may not be who they say they are on an online personal ad. Seriously are you going to advertise that you have a restraining order against you from your previous relationship, you are an alcoholic, you have had your drivers license taken away from all of you previous DUI's and you are not really the athletic guy you see in that picture instead you are a fat, bald guy who is about 40 not 27?

I had dinner and hung out with an amazing guy last night. Too bad he is just a great friend. We had the best time, at least I thought we did. We've known each other since Jr. High, but were never the best of friends. He went off and joined the Navy and traveled the world, while I stayed back here in Bensenville. Through the magic of AIM, MySpace and Facebook we have kept in touch over the years. He's in Chicago for a few weeks and I offered to take him to dinner at Morton's, which he had never been to, and being a concierge going to fine dining restaurants for free is a perk of my job. We had a great dinner. We caught up on a lot of things. He came back to the APT and we watched a movie and then the entire third season of Entourage, which since I had not seen seasons one and two, really meant nothing to me. Overall it just a great night. He didn't try to be all touchy, feely or anything crazy even though we were both drinking! I told him I could only be so lucky as to find a guy like that. It's too bad when the good ones are your friends, and one of you thinks the friendship is more important than ever attempting a relationship. Maybe its true what they say that men and women can not be "just friends" since one of them always wants something more from the other one at some point.

Moral of the story, I have to keep looking and maybe someday my prince will come!
Most likely he will not come from a singles website!

Crying

There was a time that my mother thought I was cold-hearted. She thought I cared about no one and was completely emotionless. Then I went to my grandfathers funeral when I was in high school.
I was never a crier, never really found it helpful, but that day my family heard me cry so hard I made other people cry. Since then its all I do.
It wasn't my first funeral, ask my brothers, sister and cousins and we will all tell you we grew up in funeral homes, we had an older family and we were never left at home. We would give people tours, we knew where the cookies were, how to turn the TV or radio on and where they were, so it wasn't the funeral it was that it was my grandpa's funeral. The only person who I knew believed in me and had all the faith in the world that despite everything that had happened with my family I would make a better life for myself. The man I counted pennies with and watched Wheel of Fortune with now is a picture on my refrigerator with the quote "Jesus says, I am with you always." I had the picture hanging in my bedroom since I was in second grade, at all three of my houses and now my apartment.
Crying since has come very easy.
If I have a bad day at work, I cry. If I see something that reminds me of Aimad, I cry. When I was dating Aimad and he said something, I cried. If I am watching a commercial that is cute, I cry.
Since Aimad broke up with me and even a few weeks before that when I knew things were ending, I have cried myself to sleep every single night. I still hate crying, it solves nothing and makes my eyes and face all blotchy, but I can't seem to stop myself. I can't seem to get myself out of this funk that I have been in for almost three solid months.
Tonight I was lying in bed yet again attempting to sleep when I was reminded that the new Disney movie about Chihuahua's will be coming out soon. Originally it was to be out next Friday and I still have the text from Aimad saying that we would have a special date because I was his "Little Chihuahua." Now every time I see those posters, see the commercial think about a chihuahua, I cry.
I cry when I get the mail and all it is is bills I can't pay, that's double the tears.
I cry when I look at my phone and see that no one has bothered to call me in weeks except work and my mother. I cried when I was denied the raise I asked for and think I whole-heartedly deserve. I cry when I work too much and I cry when I don't work enough.
I've been told I am happy being miserable, but I am not I just don't know what to do differently. Technically I have voided all of the people from my life that were hurting me and bringing me down but all that did was leave me alone. I'm too broke to go out and meet new people and by the way, where do you go when you are going alone?
I need something to change. I need something that makes me happy, confident and ready to face the world. Lately I feel so weak I don't want to get out of bed, I don't want to get dressed and leave the apartment, and on my days off I don't. Last week on my day off I slept until 6:00pm, checked my email, fell asleep for an hour and then watched TV until 5:00am. Never once did I take a shower, get dressed, or leave the apartment, I didn't even walk downstairs to get the mail.
I was once a leader, someone people came to for help, now that I feel I need help I also feel I have no one to turn to and yes, I am crying.

The Women

Have you heard about this movie that came out today, "The Women?"
Amazing movie!

A girlfriend and I went after a rough night at work to see this movie and we couldn't stop laughing or agreeing with everything they were saying! The cast was all women, not one man is seen in the film not even as an extra and it works. Men are talked about, implied to have been there and even talked to on the phone but not once is a man seen.

It's a film about friendships and relationships, just like any other movie made for women is, but it takes a new approach. These women are successful despite their men. The start and run businesses and families. They care for each other and their children like family.
The question did come up between my girlfriend and I though.

As you have seen in the previews one of the girls' husbands is having an affair and the best friend finds out first. She chooses not to tell the best friend what she knows and instead gossips it to the other friends in a "what should I do with this information" kind of a way. They say keep it to yourself. In the mean time the best friend finds out about her husbands affair.

The question that we both asked each other... What would you do if you found out that your friends husband was having an affair. A) Would you keep your mouth shut, what she doesn't know won't kill her. B) Tell her right away, she deserves to know. C) Tell someone that will tell her, then you aren't the bad guy.

I said it would depend on how close I am with the friend. If it was someone I have known all my life, good chance I would tell them, but only if I had proof otherwise you are jeopardizing the friendship. If I knew them as an acquaintance, probably not its not my place. If I didn't like the person and I wanted them to feel miserable I'll remind them every chance I get! Ooh I can be cruel.

Turn the tables, would I want to know?
I don't know.
I don't know that if someone told me that I would even believe them.
It would be a lot to take in and again depending on the friendship I had with the person giving me the alleged information, I don't know how I would take it.

I have never been a cheater nor, to my knowledge, have I ever been cheated on, but I do know people who have. In this movie the woman who has been cheated on goes from very weak and vulnerable to a very strong, success driven woman. The people I know that have been cheated on have basically crawled in a hole and died. I hope to never be cheated on I think it would absolutely be one of the worst feelings in the world.

The Secret Life of an American Teenager

One of the hottest shows of the summer was "The Secret Life of an American Teenager."
If you missed it its about a high school girl named Amy who, while at band camp over the summer, has sex for the first time with a boy named Ricky. The end result, Amy gets pregnant.
Unfortunately, at least from my high school experience, this is more and more common. High school girls are having sex and having babies. I am 26 and know I could not care for another life but at 16 I would have died!
Call me crazy but what is wrong with these kids?
Kids having kids, where are the parents?
I didn't have sex in high school and was actually looked down for it, I was a prude, I was uncool, but I also wasn't walking around wondering. I knew that I graduated without a disease, without a positive pregnancy test, without a pregnancy scare! I was just fine without it. I also didn't have the pressuring boyfriend.
Why do guys need to have sexual conquests? Why is it "cool" to sleep with as many woman as possible but if a girl sleeps with every guy she's a whore or a slut? The double standard is horrible.
Girls get pegged as "easy" while guys get a pat on the back.
After Amy discovers that she is pregnant on the show she has a decision to make, stay at her current school or go to an all girls placement school. Why was this a hard decision for Amy to make, because unlike Ricky, Amy will start to actually show that she is pregnant. Ricky, on the other hand, can continue on with his life as if nothing happened, and he did. Ricky continued to sleep around with other girls and date other girls.
What makes this a TV show and not real life is Amy starts to date Ben. Ben is the most amazing guy around and treats Amy with amazing respect and love and at the age of 16 even buys Amy a ring and asks her to marry him. In real life there is no Ben.
I had pregnant friends in high school, Ben did not exist. The Ricky's in their lives tended to disappear as well. This leaves the girl, pregnant, alone and labeled. She is labeled as easy, a whore, a slut, people look down on her. Rarely is the guy looked down upon, talked about, or labeled. Instead his friends are talking to him about "how was it," "is she a screamer," "can I take a stab at her next."
High school is hard enough being high school without sex and pregnancy involved.
The TV shows, the movies, the magazines all push "sexy" and this is what these kids see and want to be like, but kids need to be kids!
A few years back I was at my little sisters basketball game, she was in Jr.high at the time, as I sat in the stands a few sixth graders were sitting behind me. I could not believe my ears as the four of them were discussing their first times! In sixth grade I think I was still playing with Barbie dolls and playing dress up with my friends, not having sex. In sixth grade you are twelve years old, kids should be learning about the changes their bodies will be going through, not teaching the class.
Shows like "The Secret Life of an American Teenager" tend to glorify the situation, possibly sending kids running to the bedroom or the back of the car. Teenagers are impressionable and people should be more careful about what their children are watching. "Gossip Girl", "90201", "The Hills", "The OC" all of these shows show a glorified life of sex and how wonderful life can be as a rebellious teenager, life is not fiction.
The original "Beverly Hills 90210" came out when I was much younger, I was not aloud to watch it because of the sex and drinking and things I should not have been exposed to while in grade school or Jr. high, where are all of these kids parents?
I encourage parents to take a stand against their kids watching such shows at such young ages. If nothing else at least make them aware of the consequences, most likely just because they are pregnant it does not mean that they will get married or that now someone will love them. Sex and babies are a huge responsibility and they should know all of the angles before jumping into bed.

Well Hello There

Welcome,

Well I am new to the Blogger community so let me tell you a little about me.

My name is Coley and I do live in the suburbs of Chicago.
I have a Journalism Degree that is collecting dust in a closet somewhere as I am a concierge at the Sofitel Chicago - O'Hare in Rosemont. I love my job, I get to meet so many different people from all over the world and from all different backgrounds. Sometimes I feel like a glorified bartender, if you get people talking you can find out so much about them!
This week at the hotel there is this wonderful older couple, they have been together for 50 years!
They met in college, she was 17 and he was right out of the service and boy are they still hopeless in love!

I would love to find that one day, although I know longer will find my one true love at 17, I'm 26.
You would think living in such a large city such as Chicago that finding someone wouldn't be the hardest thing in the world, but let me tell you nothing worth having comes easy! I have had two boyfriends, neither worth keeping around, although when I was with the two of them just try to convince me of that!
Why do we always spout advice to our friends, but listening to it ourselves never works?
I'm great at giving advice, oh I love to say this, that and the other thing but when I am in the same situation as the person I gave the advice to, ha I never listen to myself, or the friend who is now quoting me! Yikes!

So I live alone, that has its benefits as well as its downfalls!
Benefit, I can watch whatever I want on TV, when I want. Downfall, there's no one there to watch TV with. When someone says something stupid or a great commercial comes on, there is no one there to share it with and you may end up talking to yourself. It would also be nice to be living with someone else when it comes to the bills! Any kid out there that happens to be reading this and says I can't wait to move out of my parents house... STOP! Remember it is not just about the rent, there are bills (phone, electric, cellphone, etc...) and you may want to eat so don't forget how much groceries are, car payments and gas. It adds up to be more than you may have bargained for. I know it did for me. Here's a test for you, one week before deciding to fly the parental coop, offer to buy the groceries for the house. Go to the local grocery store and buy whatever it is on the list, as well as, all those things that you really like. How much do you think you'll spend? That will be your responsibility every week when you live on your own, Roman Noodles sounding really good to you right now don't they?

I am a huge Cubs fan! I can not say lifelong though, no I became a Cubs fan because the guy I had a crush on in high school was a Cubs fan and I wanted to desperately try to impress him! I choose what was to be my career path because of it but that's neither here nor there.
His name was Sam, a little dorky now that I look back, but he let me copy his paper in English class. I found out that he was going to be on the baseball team and so I decided to become the baseball manager to be around him and show off all of my "baseball knowledge." Girls, becoming part of the team the guy you like plays for is not a good idea. You become "one of the guys." You get to hear about all the gross things guys do, and they can see you as nothing else. I never dated in high school and this was one of the reasons. Boy do their girlfriends hate you though! You got to be in places with their men that they were never aloud to go, it had its perks!
Anyways, I am a Cubs fan, my entire living room is devoted to the "Lovable Losers" of the North side. I go to the home opener game every season with my younger sister and we always freeze since it is April in Chicago! One year the game was postponed... because of snow!
My favorite player, based on looks, is Kyle Farnsworth, currently with the Detroit Tigers.
My favorite player, based on Cubbie devotion, is Ron Santo, one of the voices of the Chicago Cubs.
My favorite players, based on their talent, Mark DeRosa, Derrick Lee, Aramis Ramierz and everyone else on this awesome 2008 team! This is our year. Not only are we a great team, we deserve it! 100 years is a little much don't you think?

I do love the game of baseball. I helped in starting the team for Columbia College when I was there. I went to an art school, art schools don't have sports teams apparently and that is just horrible. So my friend Brian and I decided to start the Columbia College Coyotes. It was the only thing that kept me going in college. I was not a fan of school, I was a fan of extracurriculars.

In high school I was a cheerleader for three years, baseball manager for four years, I played the flute in the band, I was the sports announcer on the daily video announcements, I was an auditorium usher, I was part of the Varsity Club, outside of school I was a Girl Scout, selling cookies all the way through my senior year! I loved to be around other people and to be known.
Here's the problem with all that, graduation. Once you graduate and you leave what you have known and the people you know and who know you for as long as twelve years, where do you go? Who are you outside of that safe place? Sure you hang on to a few friends, but people move, people get married, start families and where are you?

That is kinda where I still am now. I graduated high school eight years ago. I did the college thing and got that out of the way in four years. I moved out of my parents safe house at the old age of 25. I am still trying to find myself. I am single, I live alone, I have a fun job, but I have nothing outside of it.
My boss actually suggested this blogging thing, something to get my creative juices flowing, and give me something to do in my late nights when I get home from work.

I haven't had things easy, nothing was ever handed to me. I work hard and I have things to show for that, my car, my apartment, the fact that the electricity is on for me to be typing this blog. This blog will be an opinion blog, anything that may be on my mind that night. It may be long or short. You may learn more about me and my past, you may not but the one thing this blog will bring is some form of finding myself.

Who is Coley in Chicago? We can find out together!