Apparently I "paraphrased incorrectly" my mother claims she did not call me a slut tonight (doesn't mean she didn't imply it) and that it was my uncle that called me a fat ass not her (she didn't say I wasn't). The point really is that she allows it to happen. She says that I want to claim to be an angel while everyone around me is being so mean when really I am just as mean. Sure have I dished it back? I just said I did but of course I "should know better" since I am the "older one". Its OK for the 13 year old to call his sister a bitch and a whore. It's OK for my uncle to tell me I am a fat ass. It's OK for me to constantly feel bad about myself apparently.
Sunday, October 18, 2009
FAMILY!
Seriously if I ever left my parents house NOT crying it would be a miracle.
The entire time I was there my bratty baby brother was telling me to go home, no one loves me and no one wants me around. My mother told me that I am chunky and that the costume I picked out for Halloween would not look good on me because I am too big for it and all I care about is having my boobs stick out like a slut.
So then I decided to watch TV, since no one was in the living room but apparently when the TV is off and no one is there it means Kevin is watching it. So for about 5min he continued to hit me in the head with his crutches and turn the TV off and tell me that I am a bitch and a whore and that I should just go home already.
Seriously if I didn't need the laundry that was in the dryer I wouldn't have stuck around. As soon as it was done though I was out and my mother had to say "why are you mad at me I didn't do anything to you I fed you" Little does she seem to know, or care, that I hate sitting at home with no job and have her tell me I'm chunky. A few weeks ago she told me I was a friendless bitch and no fun.
If I could afford it I would probably be an alcoholic, but that title belongs to my brother and sister who don't do a damn thing wrong. Neither one has a full-time job, nor do they want one. Neither one owns their own car, they fight over my mothers. Neither one has a degree, one dropped out of school and the other skips as many classes as possible. Neither one lifts a finger around the house but always have their hand out because they think they are owed so damn much.
I don't have a job, but its not by choice, up until this stupid knee injury I had worked everyday since my graduation from High School. I bought a crappy car until I could buy a nicer crappy car because I didn't want to always ask to leave. I moved out and despite not working I have been doing a damn good job of taking care of myself.
The verbal and sometime physical abuse I get from my family ... I just can't stand it. I try to remove myself from it but then I am just being a baby and having a hissy fit. But if I try to fight back when Kevin or someone is saying something or doing something to me I should know better since I am the oldest. I truly hate my life.
The entire time I was there my bratty baby brother was telling me to go home, no one loves me and no one wants me around. My mother told me that I am chunky and that the costume I picked out for Halloween would not look good on me because I am too big for it and all I care about is having my boobs stick out like a slut.
So then I decided to watch TV, since no one was in the living room but apparently when the TV is off and no one is there it means Kevin is watching it. So for about 5min he continued to hit me in the head with his crutches and turn the TV off and tell me that I am a bitch and a whore and that I should just go home already.
Seriously if I didn't need the laundry that was in the dryer I wouldn't have stuck around. As soon as it was done though I was out and my mother had to say "why are you mad at me I didn't do anything to you I fed you" Little does she seem to know, or care, that I hate sitting at home with no job and have her tell me I'm chunky. A few weeks ago she told me I was a friendless bitch and no fun.
If I could afford it I would probably be an alcoholic, but that title belongs to my brother and sister who don't do a damn thing wrong. Neither one has a full-time job, nor do they want one. Neither one owns their own car, they fight over my mothers. Neither one has a degree, one dropped out of school and the other skips as many classes as possible. Neither one lifts a finger around the house but always have their hand out because they think they are owed so damn much.
I don't have a job, but its not by choice, up until this stupid knee injury I had worked everyday since my graduation from High School. I bought a crappy car until I could buy a nicer crappy car because I didn't want to always ask to leave. I moved out and despite not working I have been doing a damn good job of taking care of myself.
The verbal and sometime physical abuse I get from my family ... I just can't stand it. I try to remove myself from it but then I am just being a baby and having a hissy fit. But if I try to fight back when Kevin or someone is saying something or doing something to me I should know better since I am the oldest. I truly hate my life.
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